New Year's Resolution Suggestions

Sometimes, I wonder about how the U.S. government spends it time. When I went on the web to find lists of popular New Year’s resolutions the top site that popped up was our federal government.  I am not sure whether they need to know this information, but I figured their info should be accurate.  You probably won’t be surprised at this dozen:
  

·       Drink less alcohol

·       Get a better education

·       Get a better job

·       Get fit

·       Lose weight

·       Manage debt

·       Manage stress

·       Quit smoking now

·       Reduce, reuse, and recycle

·       Save money

·       Take a trip

·       Volunteer to help others

An article in the Huffington Post stated “New Year’s resolutions are bit like babies: They’re fun to make but extremely difficult to maintain.”   When I read advice about New Year’s resolutions the advisors always advise us to be sure to set attainable goals.  That list is daunting, and I am not so sure that any of the resolutions listed are easily attainable.  So, I offer you some alternative resolutions.  Jay Leno has created the most attainable goal I have seen.

“Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people.  So overweight people are now average, which means you’ve met your New Year’s resolution.”  

     ~ Jay Leno (American Comedian, 1950- )

     The pundits tell us we need to have a plan for when we fall down on keeping our resolutions.  When asked “What does a monk do all day?” Thomas Merton replied, “We fall down and we get up, we fall down and we get up, we fall down and we get up.”  That’s a lot of falling down and getting up, and I don’t think most of us want to become monks.  It might help if you include a way to cut yourself some slack in your plan.  Catherine O’Hara has an approach that may help.

 “I know. I'm lazy. But I made myself a New Year’s resolution that I would write myself something really special, which means I have 'til December, right?”  

     ~ Catherine O’Hara (Canadian comedienne, 1954 - )

     We might also look at it from Helen Fielding’s point of view.

“I do think New Year’s resolutions can’t technically be expected to begin on New Year’s Day, don’t you?  Since, because it’s an extension of New Year’s Eve, smokers are already on a smoking roll and cannot be expected to stop abruptly on the stroke of midnight with so much nicotine in the system.  Also dieting of New Year’s Day isn’t a good idea as you can’t eat rationally but really need to be free to consume whatever is necessary, moment by moment, in order to ease your hangover.  I think it would be much more sensible if resolutions began generally on January the second.”

     ~ Helen Fielding (English Writer, 1958- )

     We also need to consider other people when we make resolutions.  You might want to make these resolutions:

 “…tolerate fools more gladly, provided this does not encourage them to take up more of my time.”  

     ~ James Agate (British Diarist and Critic, 1877-1947)

“I have no way of knowing how people really feel, but the vast majority of those I meet couldn't be nicer. Every once in a while someone barks at me. My New Year's resolution is not to bark back.” 

     ~ Tucker Carlson (American News Correspondent, 1969- )

 “One resolution I have made, and try always to keep is this: “To rise above little things.” 

     ~ John Burroughs (American Essayist , 1837-1921)

     When all else fails you could consider G.K. Chesterton’s thought and Jonathan Edwards’ resolutions.

 “The object of a new year is not that we should have a new year.  It is that we should have a new soul…”

     ~ G.K. Chesterton (English Philosopher , 1874-1936)

 “Resolution One: I will live for God. Resolution Two: If no one else does, I still will.”

     ~ Jonathan Edwards (Theologian, 1703-1753)

Happy New Year’s resolving

On Making New Year's Resolutions

     It is that time of year again when we focus on making “New Year’s Resolutions” because as some unknown writer penned, “Many people look forward to the New Year for a new start on old habits.”  Unwilling to totally hang my hat on anonymous quotes, I thought it might be valuable to consider what some of our sages have said on the subject.  Who better to heed than Mark Twain.

 “New Year’s Day – Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions.  Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.”

          ~ Mark Twain (American Humorist, 1835 – 1910)

     Now I can hear you saying to yourself, “In spite of past performances this is the year that I am going to…”  and you believe yourself.  I don’t.  I don’t believe it because from yet another unknown pundit, “A New Year’s resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.”  As Ben Franklin wrote:

“How few there are who have courage enough to own their faults, or resolution enough to mend them.”  

          ~ Benjamin Franklin (Printer,and Inventor, 1706-1790) 

    You still resist?  You want to think yourself stauncher than that?  Consider this:  "If you kept every resolution you made last year, you'd probably be skinny smart, healthy, rich - and bored."  ~ Unknown 

    It is becoming clear that some people who want to hold us accountable for our resolutions do not want us to remember who they are.  Maybe they suffer from the same lack of determination in holding to their resolutions as we do.  Is this a lack of characteer?

 “Character is the ability to carry out a good resolution long after the excitement of the moment has passed.”  

          ~ Robert Cavett (Founder, Nt'l Speakers Assn., 1907-1997)

    If you are beginning to question the wisdom of making any resolutions at all, you could regard the advice of Sophocles:

“Men should pledge themselves to nothing; for reflection makes a liar of their resolution.” 

          ~ Sophocles (Greek Playwright, 496B.C.-406B.C.)

Or:

 “A good resolution is like an old horse, which is often saddled but rarely ridden.” 

          ~ Mexican Proverb

     The good news two of our stalwart presidents think highly of your ability to turn over a new forest in making your resolutions.

 “It is part of the American character to consider nothing as desperate – to surmount every difficulty by resolution and contrivance.”  

               ~ Thomas Jefferson (Third President, 1743-1826)

 “Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other.”  

                    ~ Abraham Lincoln (Sixteenth President, 1809-1865)

    If you are now in a complete morass about to be or not to be resolved about anything, remember this:

“May all your troubles last as long as your New Year’s resolutions.”

~ Joey Adams (American Comedian, 1911 – 1999)

Happy New Year!

Christmas Greetings

Joyeux Noël           French

圣诞节快乐               Chinese (Simplified)

聖誕節快樂               Chinese (Traditional)

Frohe Weihnachten      German

Καλά Χριστούγεννα     Greek

Bo Nadal                 Galician

메리 크리스마스         Korean

Navidad Alegre          Dutch

Feliz Navidad             Spanish

С Рождеством        Russian

Iloista joulua             Finnish

Buon Natale              Italian

חג מולד שמח                               Hebrew

Geseënde Kersfees      Afrikaans

عيد ميلاد مجيد         Arabic

Sretan Božić            Croatian

メリークリスマス        Japanese

Nadolig Llawen           Welsh

کریسمس مبارک            Malay

Feliz Natal               Portuguese

สุขสันต์วันคริสต์มาส                      Thai

Priecīgus Ziemassvētkus Latvian

Срећан Божић           Serbian

Chúc mừng Giáng sinh   Vietnamese

Glædelig jul              Danish

Maligayang Pasko        Filipino

मेरी क्रिसमस               Hindi

God jul                   Norwegian & Swedish

کریسمس مبارک              Persian

Mutlu Noeller            Turkish

Среќен Божиќ           Macedonian

Merry Christmas          English

Whatever the language, may you all be blessed by the Spirit of Christmas.   ~ Michael

That It & A Box Full of Blessings

That It Beneath the Christmas Tree

What, what, what can It be that It beneath the Christmas tree?

Is It from I don’t know where? Is It from here or from there?

Is It a dozen or pair?  Will It arrive with a spare?

It might have fled from the zoo. Could It be a great gnu?

It might be from someone new, or is It from you know who?

It may be bagels and lox, but It is such a big box.

It may be coal lumps or rocks, or It might cause lively shocks.

I can rip It asunder. That could be a big blunder

If that box I should plunder.  It just leads me to wonder.

What, what, what can It be that It beneath the Christmas tree?

Wait, wait for that It to see for what that It is to be.

I could shake It like the trees.  Would there be a scented breeze?

If that It began to wheeze would it make me start to sneeze?

It is so bright and so grand.  Does It come with a brass band?

Is It remote or unmanned? Will It wriggle in the sand?

I shant be near it messing; ought not re It be guessing.

I know that I’m obsessing ‘bout that It; I’m confessing.

Wow, pow, now the It I see there beneath the Christmas tree?

Why blessings It is, full of glee given to you and to me.

A Box Full of Blessings

Our lives are easy our attitudes breezy.

We have blessings a slew when others have few:

Clean water to drink pouring out of the sink

Running cold, warm or hot in gallons a lot.

We water grass and trees as much as we please,

Lakes and pools to the brim to boat or to swim.

 There is power for lights and heat on cold nights,

Homes where we’re livin’ these gifts we are given.

We’ve money and jobs, conveniences in gobs.

We’ve enough for the toys for our girls and boys.

Trash leaves in a rush; we have toilets that flush,

Beds and bassinettes, silver and tea sets,

Shoes and mittens and full pantries in kitchens,

TVs and cable and food on the table.

We’re travelers first class in cars full of gas.

The highways are paved and by others are raved.

We have freedom to be, argue or agree.

There’s peace in a land, which is truly quite grand.

We have friends of good cheer, family so dear,

A million great blessings.  Why all the stressings?

We take for granted what others are scanted.

I hope It you see beneath your Christmas tree.

 

The Gift of the Dark Room

A Grand Circle Story

     I grew up in a home where reading was more than a pastime; it was a way of life.  My parents were readers; my father read novels and after retiring read one a day.  Nightly my brother read himself to sleep, and early on I became a reader as well.  It was expected, and in the days before television reading was often the only thing to do at night except for Saturdays.  I date myself when I tell you we would gather around a black plastic Philco radio in my bedroom and listen to Tarzan, the Adventures of the Inner Sanctum, and Roy Rogers. 

     We had the classics and the junior classics.  My brother and I read the Hardy Boys, Buck Rogers, Mike Hammer, the Brothers Grimm and Dickens.  We read the local and the city newspapers.  My mother subscribed to a growing selection of women’s magazines, and I would run home from school on the days when I thought my copy of Boy’s Life or Field and Stream might arrive. I do not remember my parents or grand-parents reading to me though I imagine that is how it began.

     Our parents expected us not only to gain a successful public school education, but to achieve a classical education at home.  Education was “the way out” of the central Pennsylvania coal-mining town.  A high school education kept my father and his brother out of the mines.  A college education would get us out of the town, and so, we read, questioned and discussed what we read.

     As a child my older son, emulated his uncle by reading in bed.  Maybe it was due to his mother shushing him with, “Be quiet now, your brother is sleeping.”  He read at school and whenever he had time to himself.  He began with Seuss, Clearly, and Bernstein.  He read the dead dog series including Where the Red Fern Grows, Stone Fox, and Old Yeller.  Eventually he moved on to Tolkien, Stevenson and Lewis.  He fit the family mold, and occasionally took part in book discussions.  Along with many of our friends my wife and I were teachers; book talk was an occupational pastime.

     My younger son was a reader of different ilk.  He went through school without ever reading a novel. He read his schoolbooks, magazines, and the sports page, particularly the box scores.  His chosen genres extended not far beyond “Sports Illustrated.”  Like the older generations of men in his family he disdained reading directions, but his true divergence was that at all cost he avoided reading a novel.  To prepare for school assignments he would read the Cliff Notes and rent a video rather than read the book.

     During a book-filled evening when our friends were gathered, he chimed in with, “What scenes are you talking about?  There aren’t any pictures in your books.”  He was about eight, and I realized he did not visualize what he was reading.  I was stunned.  For all my experience as a teacher I was at a loss about how to help him see “the pictures.”   How do you get someone to see what isn’t there?  A decade passed before the answer presented itself.

     My son went off to college.   After a year, for reasons apart from this tale he left school, planning to work and return later.  Later became much later after he injured himself and hobbled on crutches for months.

     Financially cut off from a scholarship and his parents, he was living in a dreary one-room apartment.  I did not know how dingy it was until I saw it months later.  I wrote in a letter, “When you first described your apartment as small with two windows and no light, I could not picture it.”  During a phone call he said he just bought a black and white TV that when attached to an extension cord, “I can take it anywhere in my apartment, not that I can’t see if from anywhere in my apartment.”  I began to have a sense for its dimensions.  Not until I visited him, did I understand how dismal his space was.

     His U district apartment was on the second story interior of a four-story building.  The two windows opened onto a central shaft. There was a single bulb hanging from a cord in the center, a small table on which sat the TV, two chairs, and a double bed mattress on the floor in a corner.  The need for crutches limited his movement. He was even less able to negotiate the stairs to go outside.  He was living in a cave.  That became the source of inspiration for how books could reveal their pictures to him.   

     The previous year I read Trevanian’s book Shibumi, an international intrigue novel.  Its protagonist, a spelunker in his off duty days, had a sixth sense that allowed him to feel the presence of the world around him in the dark.  When I returned home I mailed the book to my son.  It was the right book at the right time.  He read it and read others.  He had seen the pictures.

     His gloomy, postage stamp apartment equipped with the finest black and white TV that fifteen dollars could buy set the scene for him to read.  In his black and white world he created the color images.  It was the gift of a dark room.  When healed he moved into an apartment with light, but continued read.

     Until four years ago I thought little about that event.  It arose in my consciousness when in the space of ten days the right books came at the right time.  The first, William Bridges’ Transitions, I found while rearranging my small library and has a 1980 copyright.  I mention the date because my wife bought it before I knew her.  At a time when I was trying to make sense of life after her passing and that of my parents, she was still helping me.  For all the times I had rearranged books in the house I had never seen that book. 

     Then a man I had known for only three days at a retreat sent me C.S. Lewis’ A Grief Observed.   It presented a chronicled view of experiences I was having.   Within a week an acquaintance handed me Jerry Sittser’s A Grace Disguised, and a friend left a wonderful book, Stories for a Man’s Heart, where I would find it.   Those people and books helped me through a period of challenge in my life.  Transitions gave me a framework to begin to understand my own changing life.  Jerry Sittser’s story of loss provided a mirror and a reason for hope.  When I was totally down I gained solace from reading Stories for a Man’s Heart.   Sometimes it just helped me laugh.

     The role of reading and books in my life had made the grand circle.  It took a decade for me to find the opportunity to reveal the images in novels to my son.  Years later, in the span of a few days caring people helped me gain new images to redefine my future.  The experience reminded me of how often others had thoughtfully chosen books for me. An Irish cuisine cookbook from my brother, a Times crossword book sent by a cousin, and a collection of essays from a daughter-in-law all arrived at opportune moments.  I am grateful for the gifts of the spirit accompanying each, and hopefully I will take the opportunity to complete the circle again.

     Since that time I continue to receive thoughtful gifts of books from family and friends.  More importantly may be the increased consciousness I have about how the gift of a book might impact others. This grand circle has become a series of loops I plan to continue. 

     Wondering about what to get someone for Christmas?  Consider a book.  It may contain gifts within it that you would never imagine.

The Sweeper

     We had our carpets cleaned yesterday.  The need was certainly past due.  My delinquency or outright neglect reminded me of a man I call “the sweeper”.  For years around the corner from my school I would see a man working in his yard.  More than once I paused to watch him.  He was middle-aged, modestly dressed usually in slacks and undershirt.  There was nothing particularly distinguishing about him.  He may have considered himself an insignificant man in an insignificant yard. 

The yard was but a small piece of hard packed ground no larger than the free throw lane on a basketball court.  Bordered on two sides by chain link it lay before a tiny trailer on the corner of an aging trailer park in central Phoenix.  With its steel and aluminum containers packed in, it bore no semblance of the “mobile home” parks of its suburban snowbird counterparts.  There were no vestiges of better days gone by.  

     Each day the man dutifully swept the yard clear of debris and deposited it in a nearby trash can.  Afterward he would return to sweep the dirt into a parallel pattern of brush strokes.  He worked slowly and methodically as would an artist before his canvas.  It was his yard, and he labored in it equal to any grand estate.  I always imagined that the condition of his home inside was the same.

     Whether or not he considered himself significant, he was significant to me.  His perseverance in exercising stewardship for what was likely a rental property was significant.  His caring attitude for that small patch of ground reminded me that each of us receives a small patch of this planet for which we are responsible.  For some of us it is a spacious house in the burbs.  For others it is simply a tiny trailer in the urban core of our cities; and for even others it may be but a shopping cart.  Regardless of our leases or mortgages, we are each only renters of our property.  It is ours for a while; eventually it will pass into the care of others.  The same is true for our many possessions.

     We hear much about the size of our footprint on this planet.  We are asked to be responsible users of its resources.  In this period of wanton consumerism of the holiday season and in what to a great degree has become a disposable society, “the sweeper” reminds me of my responsibility to be good a steward of the gifts I receive.  May I learn to prize all that I have as much as a man who daily sweeps clean a small patch of dirt. 

~ Joyeux Noël