Friday Lite - "October Fives"

Emulating Our Newscasters

     My friend Bill just sent me “news.”  Now mind you, I put news in parentheses, which means it may not be news at all.  Don’t you think someone has known the headline below for a long time?   It isn’t news, just newer reporting of old information? That’s a matter to be taken up on another page.  My reserved nature directed me to not put the word in a parenthicon (example enclosed:) as my other friend Bill would encourage me to do.  I know your anticipation or impatience is mounting so I will get on with the news:

This October has 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays, all in one month.  It happens once in 823 years. 

     I included it just as it was sent to me, but notice I struck through “, all in one month”.  If this occurrence was in October, it was all in one month.  We writer types frown on redundancy (no emoticon or wordamicon).  Wordamicon is Bill’s friend Cathy’s word.  I have no idea what it means, but I used it because it has a nice lilt.  My friend Schmidt has only one eye.  Would .) be a Schmidticon?

     Had the same data been written by a “pro” it would read, “October, 2010, has five Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays, which happens once in only 823 years.”  Wow, that’s a lot of commas.  Writers don’t like commas a whole bunch either; they help create the rhythm of sentence, but they can interrupt it also.  I’ll remove some.  If the computer doesn’t red-squiggly me, I will accept it.  The headline now reads:

“October 2010 has five Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays, which happens once in only 823 years.” 

     Now isn’t that succinct.  Do you care?  No!  Would you rather have me present it as edited in the first place?  Yes, but then you wouldn’t have this valuable insider’s look at the persnickety world of the wordsmith.  I didn’t burden you with all the copy fitting deletions I made. You probably think that I just merrily type these postable thoughts rendered for your reading pleasure?  Fat chance!    

     I am running out of space so comment on this October Five thing will have to wait until the next post.  I may actually include ideas and information in that one, but then it wouldn’t sound like a newscast, would it?  That October 2010 has five Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays, which happens once in only 823 year may only be marginally interesting in the first place. Trust me, it might not be news, but it will be infotainment.  Now that sounds more like a newscast item.

     Yawl come back now; hear? (I thought I’d end with quaintness  ala Tom Bodette.  You likely sense that I am searching for my “voice”.)